Saturday, January 15, 2011

I'm not cool, but I've met cool people..does that count?

Okay, so I am not cool- not at all. About 8 years ago I had a student reference some music he was listening to and I realized I had never heard the song or the artist and didn't even know the genre of music. It was that day I knew I had crossed over. Over into old. I was 30. I know 30 isn't old, but for me it was the transition from youth and coolness into fuddy duddy. I didn't know the music, but worse still, I didn't care.

The funny part is, I am constantly surrounded by "cool" people. They wear designer jeans and the most "in" brand of shoes. Their iTunes has the most current, interesting music. They know what Vimeo is and what the best apps are for their phones. Their vocabulary is streaked with slang they actually use correctly.

My jeans are from Target. I bought my shoes on clearance at Fashion Bug. The last iTunes I downloaded was a free Christmas song. I have no clue what Vimeo is, although I am smart enough to figure it out if I cared. I have blocked the internet on my phone so I don't accidentally pocket dial and have to pay. I have never used the word "sick" for anything other than the traditional way, as in my daughter is puking.

We have established I am not cool, but I know cool people and I am meeting more all the time. Does that make me cooler by default, or just make me dorkier in their shadow? I've decided if I embrace my lack of coolness, I am happy either way.

But next post I am totally talking about all the cool people I am meeting!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Hostess with the Mostest

True statement- I cannot stand product parties. You know what I mean. Pampered Chef, Tupperware, Avon. (Do they even have Avon parties anymore, or did that end in the late 70's?). When you attend a party you have to smile, even if the food stinks and you don't know anyone. You have to ooh and ahh over products that are overpriced and more of a pain to use than a convenience. Then you get talked into hosting one yourself. Then you have to clean your house, make goodies and smile a lot.

Here comes the hypocrite in me. I hosted a party yesterday. It was for Scentsy candle thingys. Another true statement- I actually like the stuff and didn't mind the party at all. My friends were nice and humored me by coming, then they were even nicer and bought a bunch of stuff. That means I get a bunch of free stuff. Cool. Another true and hypocritical thing, I have some favorite Pampered Chef and Tupperware stuff I really like. My favorites: cookie scoop, 6 cup mixing bowl w/ lid, pizza stone, strawberry huller, and my Tupperware measuring cups that include a 3/4 cup. Awesome.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Pass the Remote

I enjoy television but I don't really have the time or inclination to watch it live. We only have access to satellite because my parents pay for a box they let us use, but it doesn't have the fancy recording ability. This is good because I can't tape episodes of Top Chef, The Mentalist, House Hunters, Dirty Jobs, Cash Cab or crazy Japanese games shows and Laker games for my husband. The only things that get watched on "live" TV are cartoons like Olivia and Max and Ruby when I am trying to get housework done and entertain a two year old at the same time. 
Fortunately, we do have DSL and I discovered Hulu a while back. Not a lot of shows I used to like are there, but there's still plenty to occupy that hour or so a day I want to mentally check out.  My list is short compared to some TV junkies: Chuck, Castle, Psych, Hawaii 5-0, Burn Notice, Drop Dead Diva, Medium, Leverage and the most hilarious show, Raising Hope
I thought Psych was the only show that could make me laugh out loud, but put Martha Plimpton, Garret Dillahunt, Lucas Neff and Cloris Leachman together and I can't stop cracking up. Ah, I love TV. Tonight's episode had a barking baby, a flashing grandma and a lot of crazy arrests, all in 30 minutes!
Some people are funny about TV. The other day I heard someone say, in the same breath, "I like taping Glee so I can watch it whenever I want, but I stopped watching Hawaii 5-0 because I didn't want that life being brought into my home." I almost laughed out loud (see, not just TV does it for me!) but I held my tongue. People are funny about what they'll watch and won't watch. Teen sex is okay, but violence is bad. Hahaha. 
Of course, I shouldn't judge, right? This is the first season I haven't watched Survivor in all the years it has been on....I finally decided it wasn't worth my time. Took me long enough!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

High School Reunion

They are quite often involved in the plot of a movie or television show- the highly anticipated high school reunion. Last night was...gasp....my twenty year high school reunion that I did not attend.
Reason #1: I didn't feel like paying $30.00 to sit at dinner and make small talk with people I barely spoke with twenty years ago. ($60 if I made my husband go with me).
Reason #2: I knew my husband would be bored to death. He doesn't even like making small talk with people we invite over to our house, let alone people he has never met.
Reason #3: Aside from perhaps two friends I hung out with in H.S., I couldn't think of a single soul who would be attending that I knew very well at all. Many of my close friends from H.S. live in other states.
Reason #4: I see a few of the people I went to H.S. with (since I have lived in the town I went to school in for about 11 years). Some of them are friendly enough, but some think we should still have the same H.S. caste system of twenty years ago.
Reason #5: I wasn't unpopular in H.S. but I wasn't one of the "popular" kids. I never did go to a single "cool" party where drinking and making fools of oneself was the acceptable form of entertainment.
Reason #6: Honestly, aside from my fabulous children (which no one wants to hear about), I have nothing interesting going on in my life. As of Saturday I am jobless except for some tutoring and so is my husband who's newly acquired 2nd teaching credential is garnering him zero interviews.
Reason #7: I was tired and didn't feel like chit chat.
Reason #8: I doubt anyone would notice my absenteeism.
Reason #9: There is a multi-year reunion like every year around here!
Reason #10: I had nothing to wear and haven't had time to get a cute haircut lately.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Drabble

My sister knows I've been wanting to force myself to write more often. (Well, to write. Period. I don't really consider blogging writing.) She had a link to this other blog where someone is having people submit a 100 word (exactly) little story. So, I did it. It is fun having a task. Here is that blog if it floats your boat: http://wendyswore.blogspot.com/
Here is my 100 word little drabble entitled "Sad Goodbye". 
I breathe deeply, bite my bottom lip, and gather all my courage for my goodbye speech.
“I’m sorry, but we’re no longer working out.” I give her a quick pat, showing my regret. “Eleven years is a long time. Most of it was really good, but lately you’ve just let me down. I haven’t been able to depend on you ever since that day on the interstate.” “You will always be my first; I will never forget you.” I hand the key to my beat up 1999 Ford Escort over to the thrilled teenager buying her for just 1,300 dollars. 

Monday, May 24, 2010

Dream Interpretations

Wanted: free dream interpreter. Every morning I wake up tired, even after eight hours of sleep. Reason: I dream all night long. Last night I was trying to protect a house full of people from wild animals that lurked outside. The exterior doors of this concrete house in the desert actually had pet entries and no way to lock.  Each interior room lacked a door as well. It was 3:15 a.m. in my dream; I awoke and went to the window. Looking out there were mountain lions and a large black bear with her bear cub. Someone else was trying to help me keep the door shut, but the cub crawled through the doggy door, and we ran to hide in the closet but everyone else was in sleeping bags on the floor with no way to protect them from the coming bear. That was the end of that dream.

That was just one of my dreams last night. It would be so much more interesting if someone would provide me with my interpretation!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Self-Fulfilling Stereotypes

I do honestly hate the term "white trash". It is just ugly. Here comes the 'but'. But, today I was sitting (for a very long time actually) in the waiting room of a local doctor's office. Actually, it is more like a health clinic that takes anyone, and lucky for me, I am anyone- the type of anyone who is too poor to afford "real" insurance and relies on more inexpensive forms of health care. That is an entirely differently post- the woes of state medical programs and the way you are treated if you do not have "real" insurance. 
Back to the waiting room. One hour is an awfully long time to be stuck in a waiting room with no reading material. I brought my alumni magazine with me but left it in the car (and heaven forbid I go to retrieve it, they call my name, and I miss my turn). So, I made lists on the back of a flyer, and did what I do best- watch people. 
If you are poor, as I believe we currently are, there is no just cause to act/look/behave like it. Does being poor prevent you from brushing your teeth? Does being poor prevent you from spending a minute combing your hair or applying deodorant? Does being poor cause you to crave having tattoos placed at the very edge of your butt crack so when you wear those cutoff jean shorts and skanky short tank top the rest of us get to view your ex husband's lovely face? Does being poor automatically make you have five children who don't wear shoes and  behave like monkeys in public? Does being poor mean you have to smell like cigarettes and invade the invisible personal waiting room space? There are other chairs a little further away from mine.
Does this make me prejudiced? Prejudiced against what, though? People who have no self respect? Well, then I guess I am.